Dear Eggplant, it's over.
Oct. 13, 2012 3:06 pm
Updated: Oct. 16, 2012 11:04 am
I am afraid it is over. I have tried to love you for a long time now, but I can't fake it any longer. I love you for your beautiful looks and nothing more. This superficial relationship cannot continue. I need to love you on the inside as much as I love you
on the outside.
I have tried to hook you up with Lasagna and that didn't work out, I have tried bread crumbs, tomato sauce and pasta and that didn't work out. You didn't play nicely with fresh bread and peppers or tahini and olive oil so this is why I am dumping you. If you
want to be eaten by me, then you need to play nice with other ingredients.
On the inside, you are ugly, bitter and rubbery. It might be that I have not treated you right but our time has come and I have to decide. I have to decide for the protection of my taste buds and the other ingredients- you are not working out.
I know you will not be on your own for long, there are plenty other ingredients out there that would be happy to pair with you, and plenty of other cooks with more patience than I.
I am sorry if I have hurt your feelings eggplant. Please let me know if you change your ways. I need you to be tastier, more visually appealing with your skin off, and not so bitter and offensive to my taste buds. Until then you are outta my fridge and outta
my recipe box.