A Neanderthal Welcomes Spring - "It's Only Food" Blog at Allrecipes.com - 270717

"It's Only Food"

A Neanderthal Welcomes Spring 
Mar. 20, 2012 5:32 pm 
Updated: Mar. 24, 2012 5:29 am
Spring is trying to make a premature appearance here in Minnesota and beside the long-awaited thaw and the resurrection of baseball, golfing, garage sales and fishing, we dream of the day the men can pull the Weber’s out of the garage and anoint them with slabs of animal flesh to grill upon their hallowed embers. 
We live in a row of townhouses with close proximity to our neighbors.  I noticed all the men on both sides of our dwelling re-discovering their inner caveman as they pull out their grills and loaded them with coals and raw protein in a humble offering to the gods of fire and vinegar based sauces.
Not to be outdone, I uncovered my portable fire pit and drive off to Costco to hunt down a worthy prey.  With one kill shot I brought down two racks of pork ribs for $24.19 and brought them home and lay at my wife’s feet.
While she prepared a dish she called “salad”, I seasoned and rubbed the meat with spices and herbs to best augment the essence of the day’s hunt. (Recipe below)
We enjoyed the meal, I glowed in the fact that I was the man and provided for my woman. She, on the other hand, did the dishes, put away the leftovers, cleaned the kitchen, balanced the checkbook, helped the kid’s do their homework, put away the rest of the groceries and started a load of laundry, letting me revel in my fantasy of superior DNA.
 Teriyaki Ribs
1 rack of baby back ribs (raw)
1 battle of teriyaki glaze
Place the ribs in a shallow baking dish after removing the connective tissue from the back.  Pour ½ the bottle of teriyaki glaze over the meat and cover liberally with both sides.  Add a small amount of water to the bottom of the pan and cover with wax paper and then foil.  Place in a pre-heated oven (350 degrees) for about 2 hours.  This can be done before you light the coals. If you are cooking with gas then you need to become a man and buy a charcoal grill.  Cavemen did not cook with gas.  When the ribs are cooked, take them out and put them on the grill and finish them off by adding more of the glaze as they cook.  The glaze will caramelize and get a bit crispy with the meat-but that is a good thing.
Mar. 21, 2012 7:27 am
This year, I'll be a real caveman and cook on fire! We had an ice storm that brought down lots of maple aand apple. Good fire and smoke. Mmm Mmm!
Mar. 21, 2012 8:41 am
I live in MN too and the mild winter and early spring as been awesome! It is nice to people out grilling, but honestly we have neighbors who will be out grilling in 30 degree weather- no joke! (men of course)
Mar. 21, 2012 11:42 am
While we don't get anywhere near the cold you have in MN, my DH thought nothing of standing out in a snow storm to grill a steak. He sheltered more than one rack of ribs from rain with a golf umbrella too. It's so nice to have someone with that Y chromosome, willing to provide for us. ;)-
Mar. 24, 2012 5:29 am
Caught my guys all standing around the grill the other day making grunting noises and am pretty sure one or two of them were beating on their chests! Might have heard a howl but cant say for sure ;) Seems grilling season is upon us now the ritual has been preformed! LOL
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John Politte

Home Town
Leavenworth, Kansas, USA
Living In
Coon Rapids, Minnesota, USA

Member Since
Oct. 2009

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Cooking Interests
Grilling & BBQ, Stir Frying, Slow Cooking, Asian, Mexican, Indian, Italian, Middle Eastern, Mediterranean, Vegetarian, Kids, Quick & Easy, Gourmet

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About Me
I have been a professional restaurant person for 30+ years. I started out as a dishwasher and worked my way up the ladder. No schooling except for hands on experience in locations around the USA. I am now starting my own business as a consultant and food writer.
My favorite things to cook
Everything-except baking and desserts
My favorite family cooking traditions
Gravy, my side of the family is mostly French , so we love the sauces and gravies.
My cooking triumphs
Starting my own public access cooking show-"It's Only Food". Did 33 shows in 3 years as the chef and producer. It certainly opened up a lot of doors and paved the way for changing the way I look at food.
My cooking tragedies
Missing my family growing up and working 80 hour weeks, but I can say that it paid off. No regrets.
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