My Empty Nest - Put the Kettle on.... Blog at - 248419

Put the Kettle on....

My Empty Nest 
Aug. 28, 2011 5:40 am 
Updated: Sep. 5, 2011 4:42 pm
It seems many of us are going thru the Empty Nest Syndrome in some way or another. It's that time of year - our "little ones" are heading off to college and leaving us alone.  Hubby and I are back to the empty nest - for a while anyways.  Steve headed back to school yesterday for his final semester of college. He'll be home in December and here he will stay.  Until he gets a job that can afford rent and all the other "adult" things we seem to spend our money on.

Steve going back to college is always a semi-sad time for me.  I love having him home and I know I'll miss him when he leaves.  But - I also love having the peace and quiet, probably because I know it's only temporary.  This year was a little different than all the years past and I have felt some guilt over it.  Steve bought a truck this summer and so he no longer needed us to haul all his things back to school; which means he went back without us in tow.  We said our good-byes in the driveway and then I left with my daughter and sister for a shopping/winery day trip.  That helped ease some of the guilt feelings I was having. 

Yesterday morning I was still asking him, "Are you sure you don't need us to follow along behind in the car? You might need some help carrying your clothes in, or the little fridge?"  Nope -he could handle it he assured me.  I knew he could, I was just having a hard time letting him leave without his "Mommy" in tow.   The trip with daughter and sister was a great idea. I'm not sure I could have watched him drive out the driveway with his loaded down truck.  Turns out it was a real good idea.  And, here's the story why.....

Me, my daughter and sister - who's 40th birthday was yesterday - are sitting at a table overlooking a lake enjoying a glass of wine with cheese and crackers and I get a text message. From Steve.  "Umm.... guess I took a wrong turn and it was a bad idea"    I text back "What??"  The kid has already spent 4 years at school and he knows how to get there, what in the world is he talking about????   I don't get any more replies back from him for an hour until he texts "On campus, John helping me carry stuff in".    I put the strange first text out of my mind.

The rest of my day goes very well.  We have a great afternoon of mother/daughter/sister bonding time.  My little sister had never been to a winery until a few months ago when we all went to one while visiting the Islands on Lake Erie.  She loved it and has been wanting to go to more. I think I'm turning her into a "Wine-O"  LOL.  So, I leave my daughter's house and head for home.  On the short drive I start thinking about how I'm going home to a very quiet house. My husband is working a booth at the county fair and Steve is gone. I'm going to sit out on the deck with the dogs and enjoy some of that silence I've written about before.

Then I pull into our drive.  What the heck??!!  My yard is all torn up!  It looks like someone had a great time four-wheeling thru the yard.  Now, I'll stop here and mention that we live rural and our yard would never win any prizes for being beautiful - but it used to be green at least - now it's mostly large ruts and plenty of mud!  Suddenly the strange text from Steve comes back to my mind.  Hmmm.... the ruts go from the driveway down to our back door.   It's all making sense now.  I'm quite the detective -it comes from being Steve's mom, I know how he operates.  New big truck (yes, it's a 4x4), boxes to load, long walk from house to drive = Drive truck to door and save many steps. Oops - forgot to realize how soft the yard was. But, hey - Four wheel drive works great in new truck.

I send Steve a text "Turfing your own yard is not a good idea".  The response? "LOL" So I send the hubby a text (who was home when Steve left). "So, who turfed the yard... and why?"  the response "I guess I wasn't real specific about where to park the truck for loading it up"  Hmmm... guess not.  Next response?  "Somebody has a heck of a mess to fix, huh?! One guess who it will be.."  My response?  "Well.. Steve is gone and it won't be me. That leaves you!"  His response?  "Winner!"  

Our yard isn't pretty now, not even remotely. But, things like that don't really upset any of us too much. It can be fixed. And really - it's good for a few laughs. Steve's final trip back to school will always be a good story. 
Aug. 28, 2011 6:58 am
My husband and I just took our last two kids at home to University last week,they are both at the same school. I have already gone through this ordeal with our oldest, so I can really relate to your wonderful post. It will make for a good memory to laugh about when your son has his own children:)
Aug. 28, 2011 7:06 am
June, sounds like maybe you have twins? That means you had double the separation! When my oldest went away, she ended up staying on campus throughout the summers as she was a "house mom" for summer school students as part of her campus job. We really only moved her in once and then brought her home. Yes, my son leaves many "stories to tell" in his wake wherever he goes and whatever he does! :-)
Aug. 28, 2011 8:15 am
Funny stuff! My kids are all grown and have been for some time! Still miss them this time of year!
Aug. 28, 2011 8:38 am
Hey Mother Ann, sorry to hear Steve went back to school. I'll send my brood over to ya right away ; ) Irene hit us with mostly wind so we have downed trees and uprooted bushes. So our yard probably matches yours!! Hope everyone is well and that was a great idea to goto the winery with "the gals. Take care.
Aug. 28, 2011 9:10 am
LOLOL! I can relate to the yard story. The empty nest is going to happen here soon too. I'm not quite sure how I will handle all quiet "me" yet. Maybe I will finally get all those projects done :)
Aug. 28, 2011 10:26 am
Well, my 10 yr old daughter tells me that she will NEVER move out. I am so relieved that I will not have to experience an empty nest!!! ;)
Aug. 28, 2011 1:46 pm
dragonfly22, no need to send your brood over, but thanks! :-) I have my "adopted" grandchildren to keep me company when I feel the need... Hubby just spent some time turning the dirt over to cover the ruts in the yard. Not perfect, but at least the dogs won't break a leg falling into a rut!!
Aug. 28, 2011 1:47 pm
Terry, I think we always will "miss" our kids. And worry about them, too.
Aug. 28, 2011 1:47 pm
CatHill, good luck on completing projects. I haven't done that yet - but I have thought of more projects I could complete.
Aug. 28, 2011 1:48 pm
Michelle - Lucky you!! :-)
Aug. 28, 2011 1:50 pm
Oh, and just a little note. Today was our first day of "empty nest". Our daughter came over and went to the county fair with us. My son has called me at least 5 or 6 times already. He forgot his pillows, soaps, deodorants, who knows what else. I'm thinking I should have pushed the old "You need your mom to help you" thing a little more. :)
Aug. 28, 2011 5:30 pm
Our son was a rebounder until he was 21. At age 18, our daughter left to tour the Soviet Union, then went straight to college and parenthood without looking back. Now, we get to see the granddaughters stretching their wings as they approach adulthood. Not fair. Not fair. Not fair. When life no longer sucks, it's pretty durned good!
Aug. 29, 2011 3:12 am
You are so right, Mike - life is good when it doesn't suck! :-)
Aug. 29, 2011 2:46 pm
Thanks for a great chuckle. Steve had 3 things working against him 1. he's male, 2. he's young 3. he just had to know what that truck could do LOL! I am positive he is a very bright young man, but they just don't reason like we do. Enjoy him while you can.
Aug. 29, 2011 5:04 pm
LOLOL! Yep, those projects will get done after I walk Bane and then try to walk Pippin and.....
Aug. 29, 2011 6:45 pm
BigShotsMom you are so right! I really think you hit it right on with your #3! LOL
Sep. 1, 2011 11:16 am
We are approaching our 49th wedding annivesary in Oct. We raised our two children. Then we raised our daughters oldest child and she is 31 now. Now we have two of her 4 children we are raising . The youngest is 2/5 years old. I told my Dr. the other day he had to keep me healthy until I am atleast 90 to get that one through high school!!!!It is a long story of why we are raising these two and I won't bore you with the details.I don't think an empty nest is in our future!!
Sep. 3, 2011 6:19 am
char - you are wonderful to be raising your children's children, etc. It will keep you young that's for sure!
Sep. 4, 2011 5:39 am
Loved the story, Just dropped our twins off at school, it was a difficult few weeks leading up to their departure. It will take me until their winter break to clean up the trail of havoc they left. I do miss them but have to admit it, so nice to walk into the kitchen and see it in the same condition as I went to bed. I don't miss the late night snack mess!
Sep. 5, 2011 4:42 pm
ejeanp - I can totally relate to that kitchen mess! But with twins it must be twice as bad! LOL. My son is a late-night snacker. When he goes back to school it's always nice to have my nice clean kitchen again in the morning and no empty glasses sitting around. :)
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Mother Ann

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Streetsboro, Ohio, USA
Living In
Ravenna, Ohio, USA

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Oct. 2009

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About Me
I've been married for 33 years, and live in Ohio. We have a daughter who is married and lives nearby. Our son graduated from college and moved to South Dakota. He has his own place but still goes to visit my sister and brother-in-law and have dinner with them occasionally. We have two black labs that get to go duck hunting with dad and two cats. We own a Mexican restaurant and are learning alot about the food industry. I love to eat, go camping, read, spend time with family and friends, watch movies, and drink wine; not necessarily in that order.
My favorite things to cook
I love to bake - anything chocolate is fine with me. Seafood, chicken dishes and slow-cooker fare.
My favorite family cooking traditions
My husband and I enjoy cooking together with wine. We pop open a bottle of wine and get cooking. :-)
My cooking triumphs
Whenever I can put together a meal that gets many compliments and leaves the diners satisfied is a triumph in my book! I love to cook meals for family and friends.
My cooking tragedies
When I was first married we had my grandparent's-in-law over for a pot roast dinner. The meat came out great, but the potatoes and carrots were still half raw. My husband's grandfather went to cut his fork into a carrot and it flew off his plate. He looked at me, winked, and said he loved his carrots that way!
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