It was a dark and stormy night...
May 26, 2010 1:42 pm
Updated: May 28, 2010 4:11 am
It was 2 AM, and the house was deathly silent. My eyes were peeled open wide, but not a flicker of light could penetrate the darkness. I groaned at the thought of a sleepless night, and listened to the rhythmic beat of my own heart. Suddenly, a flash of light entered the room like lightening through a crack in my bedroom door. I sat up, bewildered. Loud, ugly footsteps pounded down the main stairwell and I could hear the faint music of Queen from somewhere just across the hall. There was a slamming of the refrigerator door from the kitchen, and more heavy thuds against the wooden stairs. Another slam, and the light disappeared once more. Queen's distorted guitar solo cut short, and all was still. The beast had come out for his nightly rounds, and had returned to his layer to slumber and feed.
Now, I'm assuming that most of you know this sort of boogie-man very well. They're the person in your household who is what I like to call a "night-feeder." They never eat breakfast, and their lunches are rather pitiful and unhealthy scraps of junk food. They have a heavy dinner, and an even heavier late night snack. In this particular instance, the creature is none other than my 18 year old brother Nick. Just graduated from high school, leaving for a Euro-trip with friends in a week, he's literally been eating us out of house and home, always after hours. My mom has a rather quaint obsession with fruit bowls, and a large amount of apples, peaches and bananas are always available in our house. However, have you ever eaten an apple, three peaches, and two bananas in one sitting? Apparently, Nick has. He also had some pasta and a big bowl of ice cream. Or at least that's what I have come to assume by the remnants he leaves embedded in his bedsheets like fossils at an archeological dig. That's another trait of the night-feeder. They leave their messes uncleaned for a span no less than 48 hours. The third and final rule is that this creature of the night is always perfectly fit and trim, while you struggle to close your belt buckle after the first slice of pie. My brother is 5' 11" and at the most about 180 lbs.
What inspired me to blog about this is that upon waking up this morning, I heard a loud, confused-sounding scream coming from Nick's room. Turns out, he'd gone back last night to get a cup of left over chocolate mousse from the fridge. I'm not sure how it happened but he'd managed to fall asleep prior to eating it, and had rolled all over it in his sleep. His face, pajamas and sheets were a mess. Needless to say, I promised not to crack wise about it at school. But hey, if you've got a food blog, you may as well write in it.