Food Tips (and other stuff)
Jan. 25, 2014 10:46 pm
Updated: Feb. 1, 2014 6:40 am
Crazycook is watching a movie for the third time or so, and I'm sitting here chuckling to a few things... "The Help" has all sorts of ideas about just how food should be prepared, how you should deal with loved ones, and not so loved ones... For instance,
when the "ladies" meet for bridge in the afternoon, set your mother (who suffers from dementia) in front of the tv to watch her stories - remove her winter coat first, as it is 90F outside, and feed her a big bowl of ambrosia! (A glass of sherry or such helps
too, btw - it'll knock her out for a while!)
If you're born in "Sugar Ditch," don't plan on moving to "Snob Hill," (or whatever the town is called....) as the socialites will snub you... On a different note, if you name your daughter Eugenia, expect her to be called "Skeeter." (I've no idea how these
two names are related!)
Hold a matchstick between your teeth while chopping onions - you won't cry...
Beware of a maid you fired bringing you a chocolate pie... you never know just what the "secret" ingredient might be! Avoid your mother (the one with dementia) seeing you eat the TWO slices of pie, especially if she's drinking sherry again... her knowledge
will turn around and bite you in the rear at a later date... when mom helps make it public knowledge!
According to one source, Crisco Vegetable Shortening is the best invention since mayonnaise was put in a jar! It will remove chewing gum from your hair, smoothe rough dry skin on feet and hands, works great on bags under your eyes and quiets a squeeky door
hinge! Most of all, it's the ONLY way to fry chicken!
Who knew that ground eggshells get grease out of a carpet?
If "your man" knocks you around a bit, and gives you a black eye, do as they would in Sugar Ditch, and wop him up the side of his head with a cast iron skillet, and tell him to go to "H!"
For now, that sums up my recent lessons... and best said: be well, be happy, be crazy!