The Local Gazette... - Stevie's Crazy Kitchen Blog at Allrecipes.com - 258761

Stevie's Crazy Kitchen

the local gazette... 
 
Nov. 28, 2011 6:53 pm 
Updated: Nov. 29, 2011 8:23 pm
Our newspaper, the "local gazette," has been informed that many a local cook has had problems functioning during this holiday week...  After a short board meeting, it was decided to send our food editor herself out into the field, to once again write an article about this seeming epidemic.  Ima Soufflet (the 't' is silent,) being ready for the assignment,  was amazed at the information she found simply by interviewing passing shoppers, as they left the grocery stores.  Many when asked, had no idea just what they had purchased while inside the store.  Nor, did they have any idea what they were planning to cook for the Thanksgiving meal.  Mostly, the shoppers who agreed to be interviewed were in hopes that their family members and guests would bring the meal itself, allowing them to feed birds bread crumbs, or some such.

One cook, Etta MooShoo, was quoted as saying that she was in hopes of making a Lasagne, despite when pressed, she could find no ingredients for lasagne in any of her shopping bags...  At that point, being totally confused, Etta decided that she just might have a pork roast in the freezer, but she wasn't sure.  Another shopper, Birdie Baker was sure that she had a turkey in her shopping cart, which she did find in short order.  She had no idea if anyone joining her holiday table would be bringing stuffing, potatoes, or pumpkin pie.  "I'll toss the turkey into the oven, and be done with it," she was quoted as saying! 

Ima also interviewed a local doctor, Bustyer Egga, who has voiced concerns that there may be an airborn virus, which is causing total confusion in any and all "cooks."  His theory is that total sanity and clarity are messing with the minds of all cooks across the nation to the extent that they cannot function properly.  His concerns led him to consult with a friend of his in France, Coco Eclare, who assured him that French cooks were not reporting any outside influences regarding their creations, although one diner at a world famous eatery declared that his "pate de fois gras" was actually made of mushed eggplant.  The French government has refused to comment, as have the Germans, English, and most of the Middle and Far East. 

Ima Soufflet is extremely concerned that as the Christmas holiday is approaching, this epidemic may escalate.  She fears that "gruel" may be the only food offered at many a Christmas table...  "May I have more, please?"

Ima, and the "local gazette" are in hopes that "total sanity" may be stamped out by mid December, but local autorities are "not available for comment."  We will continue to report any and all issues regarding this epidemic... 

We here, support, "be happy, be healthy, be crazy!"
 
Comments
Linnie 
Nov. 28, 2011 8:11 pm
This gave me a chuckle. Thanks!: )
 
Nov. 28, 2011 8:31 pm
Linnie, that was the entire point... glad you enjoyed! Never know just what CrazyCook will come up with next... Be well, and LAUGH!
 
Nov. 29, 2011 7:09 pm
Very clever! I too got a chuckle - thanks!
 
Nov. 29, 2011 8:23 pm
Welcome, Big shots mom! Every now and then I get a bug... Be well!
 
 
 
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Stevie crazycook

Home Town
Lansing, Michigan, USA
Living In
Phoenix, Arizona, USA

Member Since
Feb. 2008

Cooking Level
Expert

Hobbies
Quilting, Gardening, Music

Links
 
 
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About Me
Started cooking many years ago, and learned as I went. First meal may have been "steak & chips" at age 15, in Birmingham England, where I lived for several years. Mostly grew up in MI, transplanted to the desert 30yrs ago, or so. Favorite cookbook is "Better Homes", also enjoy "Great British Cooking, a well kept secret." Hesitate to call myself "expert," but friends do rave...
My favorite things to cook
Italian has been my "specialty" for some time, and my "signature" meal is Lasagne, salad, garlic bread, which I first made 20yrs ago... from SCRATCH, very first time I made it. (Never again, folks...) Now start with a big jar of sauce!
My favorite family cooking traditions
Thanks to my heritage, I have enjoyed trying foods from different cultures. We still have beer battered fish, and chips of course; ground meat dishes often, chicken occasionally, pork too. I would love to submit a bean dip recipe, however, my ex who gave me the original has passed, and I have no way to verify that it didn't come from another source! I also enjoy British cooking (with a few yankee twists) and once made Plum puddings, also known as Christmas puddings, as far as I know... what an ordeal that was, but well worth the effort. Today, there is mail order!
My cooking triumphs
Greatest triumph was not too long ago, when I held a sit down dinner for 12, Lasagne being the entree. It was a fund raiser I chose to sponsor, and am proud to say that "we" raised over $1000 from that meal alone, minimum donation being $25. All proceeds collected were donated; my partner and I provided the meal and beverages.
My cooking tragedies
MEATLOAF of all things! Went through a stage of "winging" it each time, and I pulled one after another out of the oven that were almost unedible. As yet, not too big on baking... no sweet tooth here! Have dabbled, but find doughs/pastries especially difficult, perhaps as it's 90 degrees in my kitchen much of the year.
 
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