She Is Beautiful. - 1st blog name..ok. Blog at - 110745

1st blog name..ok.

She is beautiful. 
Jun. 29, 2009 10:11 pm 
Updated: Jul. 4, 2009 7:02 pm
 I'm exhausted. claire had the feeding tube inserted friday morning. her trach surgery was finished this morning. both with excellent results. no more tubes in her mouth and down her throat. it had been  21 days today, too long according to her sisters. i wanted to give her more time to recover her strenght and quit hacking so badly. a doctor agreeded and the trach was supposed to be performed this past friday, but was postponed due to the dr. until this morning. all kinds of scary outcomes postulated and considered. anyways, his concern was the blood-thinner meds she was on---not to bleed on  after the surgery. all's good, i made the right call. so scary.         ok , this past thursday, a doctor that is assigned to her for 1 week then rotated out examined her and asked if i had any questions?  since all i've been seeing is specialist type doctors i asked for a long-term prognosis. she said," from all indications it appears your wife will be a "vegetable." i backed up 2 steps to make sure if i swung at her i would not hit her. i didn't swing at her ,but she killed me with  her words. friday morning i show up very early and the feeding tube is inserted in like 5 minutes. i'm still searching claire for some type of  response. i don't tell moose, gator her mom or sisters about the vegetable prognosis. who would? i call the neurosurgeons to ask their prognosis. they don't call back....i'm in of the doctors finally calls back sunday morning. he says," your wife is doing well, too earlier to make a long-term diagnosis." he said other encouraging things as well in after-thoughts. for instance he said, "when she starts talking..." he also mentioned we do not use the term "vegetable" i named the dr and hope she is punished, but certainly did not ask for any reprissal. ok, here/s the good stuff----my daughters and ma- in law were there @ 6:45 this morning for the trach operation. . they wheel her out to elevators to take to surgery, i stop them  to kiss her and her nurse said she had responded to voice commands today. grip my hand....let go...grip my hand. she is not close to being moved off icu yet, but the upside starts now! my vegetable may be the smartest tater in the drawer. SHE RESPONDED!!! we got a pulse as they used to say! she is so strong! folks, this was made possible for the so many compassionate, caring and loving indiviuals out there praying for her. i can not explain my gratitude to all that have shown  an interest in my wife's struggle. i love and cherish each of you. may your life be enriched by sharing your sympathy, consideration and similar stories. i read back thru my blogs concerning claire and shed tears with stories about  personal tradigies that you have been through. i know your pain. many kind thoughts reflected back at each and all.
Jun. 29, 2009 10:24 pm
There are so many "doctor" horror stories to tell! The sad thing is that this doctor has NO IDEA! She doesn't even know Claire. The body goes into a self-imposed state so as to regroup. That's all Claire is doing. What a fighter! And what a fighter you are, gderr! We're all there with our gloves on!
Jun. 29, 2009 10:26 pm
it's been 21 days today deb, i was losing my mind.
Jun. 29, 2009 10:29 pm
oh gary, i sooooo know what you are going thru and i truly feel for you and your family. i think of you and claire and your daughters daily and wait patiently for your updates. what an awful comment from that dr. i too hope she is punished. she should be ashamed! but i'm sooooo glad to hear the great news. this is the kinda stuff that keeps you going. hang in there buddy! here comes a big ((((((hug)))))))!
Jun. 29, 2009 10:31 pm
hi marianne! no i'm a wuss. she is remarkable in strenghth, character and resourcefullness. she truly is one in a million. i'm so fortunate she chose me.
Jun. 29, 2009 10:33 pm
thx weeble...ya folks ROCK!
Jun. 29, 2009 10:34 pm
That must of been a horrific & disrespecting comment to hear. Keep in mind that she was wrong, your wife responded to you and that is a good sign. I send you, your wife and your family the best of wishes
Jun. 29, 2009 10:34 pm
i/m toast, i'll try to get on the evchange tommorow, i know a lot of folks are sleeping, i got to join them. nite ya.
Jun. 29, 2009 10:36 pm
Oh My God Gderr, I am so happy that Claire responded to you. That is a major improvement. Tell that stupid doctor that vegetables don't squeeze hands. I was going to rant on about that doctor but I can't I am so happy I can't stop crying. Gderr, please take care of yourself. You need to eat and you need sleep. Claire is going to need you to help her so you must take care of yourself. Thank you so much for keeping us updated. I know that I think of you and your family everyday. God Bless. Jan
Jun. 29, 2009 10:37 pm
Still praying for your wife and your whole family. I actually find myself praying for you all at really strange times (walking around here in Shanghai, shopping, etc.) I hope you continue on with positive thinking and putting your faith not in the doctors, but for The One who created them.
Jun. 29, 2009 10:39 pm
The two of you are two in a million - the doctors have only seen the others; they can't tell your story yet. Stay strong and be well. Love, Sunny :)
Jun. 29, 2009 10:39 pm
Praise God... a response! :-D I laughed thru tears at your "smartest tater" line! God continue to bless you - you sweet, strong man and faithful husband! I gasped out loud at the comment from that one doctor... she should be in a lab and not around patients or their families. Where do we line up to take a swipe at her?! ;-) Like the other doctor said ... "when she starts talking..." it's *when* not "if", keep that focus. I'm praying specifically that Claire will very soon respond to your hand in hers. Remember to take good care of yourself, gderr, because *when* she comes home she'll need a healthy you! Thanks for the update, I'm so happy the procedures have gone well.
Jun. 29, 2009 10:44 pm
hey...great news that she is responding to u...and good for u for saying something about what that 'person' said to u about her prognosis...that is so wrong...i guess that dr. didn't know any better...but you get your well needed rest and know that i think of u and your family thru out everyday...claire is fortunate to have u by her like u r hard to come take care of u...sending lots of prayers and hugs again to u and your family...
Jun. 29, 2009 10:51 pm
I am so angry that on top of all you have had to face that a highly educated idiot would be so insensitive as to utter the word vegetable to you....Focus on the positive, she is beginning to respond, thanks be to God. We'll continue to pray for you all. Thanks for taking the time to let us know her progress....God Bless you all.
Jun. 29, 2009 11:04 pm
Thoughts and prayers to you and your family!!!!! Thanks for the update and (((HUGS))) from Arizona!!!! Agreed..."hang in there buddy" :)
Jun. 29, 2009 11:06 pm
I'm so glad to hear she's responding; that's such great, positive news! I'll continue to keep you all in my thoughts, and send good wishes your way.
Jun. 29, 2009 11:34 pm
Thank you Gary for letting us know - I will update our prayer chain asap. We will continue to pray for you and Claire, for God to continue giving you strength and for Him to heal Claire completely. I am also praying for Him to give the doctor(s) and everyone caring for Claire great wisdom in treatment. She is on a journey now thru recovery, hold on to Jesus thru the mountains and valleys. All praise be to Him for His provision and kindness. He is indeed an awesome God! Keep looking up. Blessings to you Gary and your family. ♥
Jun. 29, 2009 11:53 pm
Great news Gderr, hang in there, sounds like you still have a ways to go yet, so pace yourself and take all the help you can get, positive energy and prayers out to you, Claire and your one day at a time!!
Jun. 30, 2009 12:00 am
I am so glad that you made the right "Decision" and had the courage to do it. I can only imagine how the "Vegetable" comment would have felt like a Mike Tyson hook smack in your face, I'm glad that you reported said Dr. Continue to be strong Gary, keep your chin up and I will continue to Keep you all in my heart. Trish xxx
Jun. 30, 2009 12:23 am
Tiny steps in the right direction is all we are praying for. God may not tell Claire to just get up and take off but little by little we pray God brings Claire back to you an your family and so she can finish her work she still has to do. God Bless you all and may God walk with each of you. May God hold Claire close to his heart and help her through this. Love, Annie
Jun. 30, 2009 2:31 am
Keep thinking positive thoughts & taking care of yourself, thoughts continue to be with you and your family!
Jun. 30, 2009 3:23 am
great news indeed! Keep those postive thoughts flowing and we'll keep our prayers rushing your way! Hugs! :)
Jun. 30, 2009 3:45 am
All of our prayers, warm thoughts and hugs continue to surround Claire, you and the girls. You all are in my thoughts every day through out the day.
Jun. 30, 2009 3:47 am
I hope Claire was listening when that vegetable comment was made. I hope she has the perseverance to overcome that negativism! I hope you have the stamina to continue this ordeal! I'm sure it is tough for your family to want to help Claire with her healing and be unable to do anything but watch! As she makes baby steps in her recovery process, my thoughts and prayers are with you!
Jun. 30, 2009 4:33 am
I am really happy to here that she is making some kind of progress Gderr, maybe its her way of saying she is a FIGHTER :) I have thought alot about your dear wife and am praying everthing turns out well. Sending good vibes and thoughts your way..
Jun. 30, 2009 4:34 am
gderr...I've been quietly keeping track of your wifes progress and this is the first time that I felt a smile spread across my face...BIG step for the little and your family have affected more people than you will ever know...sending an extra shot of good Karma your way...PEACE...
Jun. 30, 2009 4:35 am
Gary, Fantastic news! Keep holding her hand and hopefully all family will talk to her during this time that it takes her body to recover from this trauma. I had a feeling she might be listening more than some folks would expect in her dire condition. This is a lot of pressure for one kind man to endure alone so contemplate sharing some of the particulars with her sisters. And as I mentioned in another blog, don't always listen to the doctors, listen to your heart (though I know it is breaking). Love and prayers to you, Claire and family.
Jun. 30, 2009 4:35 am
gderr....I heard the "vegetable" comment 47 years ago, when my son was 4 months old. THAT "vegetable" (14 months later) was the FIRST child to walk with a "normal" gait while using crutches,graduated high school, put himself thru college (with no help, financial or otherwise), has worked most of his adult life, has no mental deficency whatsoever, drove from Texas to Calif. last year to visit me. THAT "vegetable" was SAVED from a life in an institutiom (where he surely would have BECOME a vegetable) by ONE Doctor who said "Too early to say what God has in store for him but I personally won't give up on him unless GOD DECIDES to take him home". Those words have stayed with me all these years. Don't YOU give up on Claire. I'm not an overly religious woman but...I do know GOD'S plan overrides any "so-called" Doctor's short term evaluation and it's up to you, Claire, and the DEDICATED Doctors to HELP carry out Gods plan, NOT lay down in defeat. Focus and build on the advances, not om the surgerys and setbacks (of which there will surely be some). Focus on Claire's strength and fighting spirit, not some speculative comment. My "vegetable" (MY SON, of whom I'm so very proud) turned out to be a veritable "oak tree". Your "tater" can too!
Jun. 30, 2009 4:35 am
Gary, Fantastic news! Keep holding her hand and hopefully all family will talk to her during this time that it takes her body to recover from this trauma. I had a feeling she might be listening more than some folks would expect in her dire condition. This is a lot of pressure for one kind man to endure alone so contemplate sharing some of the particulars with her sisters. And as I mentioned in another blog, don't always listen to the doctors, listen to your heart (though I know it is breaking). Love and prayers to you, Claire and family.
Jun. 30, 2009 4:36 am
Sweetheart, you're a better man than I am a woman! I would have knocked her socks off and my next stop would have been the hospital administrator!! That comment was totally unnecessary and uncalled for. Dr's worth their salt must respond to their patient but to the families as well. It's called positive reinforcement. It's catching! She obviously flunked in more ways than one. In one of your first blogs Re Claire, you said she was not with you. She is not only with you, she knows every word you say to her and she is "responding". Thank God. Know that you and your family are held close to our hearts as we continue to pray for that miracle of complete recovery.
Jun. 30, 2009 4:39 am
Your love for Claire is inspirational. I'm so glad that there are signs of improvement.
Jun. 30, 2009 4:46 am
Thank you Gary for taking time away from your precious Claire to update your AR family. You and your family are in our thought all the time as you can see by how many times someone inquires about your family in RE.I think You should have stood closer to that person who calls themselves a doctor so you wouldn"t miss. Please take care of yourself. Knew you and your family are Loved. Mag
Jun. 30, 2009 4:49 am
Gary, I am so glad to hear some positive news. In time, things will only get better. Thoughts and prayers still coming from me to Claire, you and the girls. Keep on keepin' on. We are all here for you (((hugs))). ♥
Jun. 30, 2009 4:51 am
Great news dgerr, I'm so glad you asked the neurosurgeon after the inconsiderate and heartless Doctor sucker punched you with the "vegetable" comment. The Dr. obviously doesn't know Claire! We are continuing to pray for her and her progress. She's already proving her strength and her resolve. Baby steps are what carry us in our faith. God bless all of you. I hope you are taking care of yourself too gderr. Claire will be so mad at you if you don't! :o)
Jun. 30, 2009 4:54 am
OMG. . .Where did that DR go to medial school? I would assume she flunked the course on dealing with patients families. Hope you don't have to deal with her again. Thanks for posting an update. You can't see us, you don't know us but you can be sure that we are here for you when you need us.
Jun. 30, 2009 5:13 am
gderr, I am looking for God to raise Claire out of that ICU and start talking lickety split any day now!Keep the faith he is with you!
Jun. 30, 2009 5:26 am
Yippee! What a way to start a morning! I'm so glad to hear things are improving down there. You guys have been in my thoughts (and prayers) all weekend. I found myself checking the blogs and the exchange to see if you had popped in. Thank you for letting us know that Claire has made some progress. Now we know where to focus our prayers. May God continue to bless you all.
Jun. 30, 2009 5:30 am
The neurologist/neurosurgeon would be best at giving you any prognosis. A "hospitalist" is just a general practitioner...not a specialist. I am sorry she was inappropriate in her response to you. I am thrilled to hear there are some positive signs of progress for you to grasp and hold your hope on to. Never give up, Gary. May God continue to grant you these little blessings/miracles. And may God bless you! Hope and prayers continue to go up for Claire's recovery.
Jun. 30, 2009 5:45 am
Oh wonderful news, GDear! What a strong gal you have in Claire! I think of you all often during the day and continue to keep you in my prayers! Stay strong, my friend! Hugs from Cindy
Jun. 30, 2009 5:58 am
Great news, gderr! Keep focusing on the positive, gain strength from that, and so will Claire!
Jun. 30, 2009 6:01 am
Yay! What great news! You said she was strong from the very beginning! What an a$$ of a doctor! You should report her. Sometimes they forget that they are not only dealing with the patient but they need to take care of the family as well. Sending you warm, positive thoughts! ((hugs)) Cara
Jun. 30, 2009 6:05 am
gderr....just wanted to say, didn't mean to comment about me, me, me. Just a personal example that others have been told the same bad stuff and sometimes IT JUST AIN'T SO!
Jun. 30, 2009 6:06 am
That is wonderful news, it gave me chill bumps and some tears this morning. I don't know how a "doctor" can say that especially one that hasn't spent much time as your beautiful Claire's doctor! The response to voice commands is wonderful news!! Gary, you and Claire have been in my prayers since day one and will remain there, I truly believe in the power of prayer. God Bless you and your wonderful family. ((((huggss))))
Jun. 30, 2009 6:07 am
This is great news! Maybe Claire heard the "vegetable" remark and has decided to show THAT doctor a thing or two! A nurse made a similar comment about my mother, after complications from open heart surgery...When we asked for an update she responded with something like "Well. if it wasn't for all those tubes and machines, your mother would be dead" No sh!t, Sherlock! That's why she's here! Never did see that nurse again...but my mom is going strong 16 years later....Claire's just taking the time she needs to heal properly. Glad to hear some positive news!
Jun. 30, 2009 6:08 am
I was so pumped to hear the positive news, gderr! I'm keeping Claire & your family in my prayers.
Jun. 30, 2009 6:11 am
I know the feeling! I saw a DR for an ultrasound when I was one week overdue with Oliver because my tummy was so little and was worried that he was malnourished or had complications due to the fact that I didn't figure out I was pregnant until 5 months in. Without explaining to me why, this DR that I met once, informed me that my son may be stillborn and we chould induce immediately. I could've attacked her on the spot. Sometimes, DR's are all textbook and no heart. Hang in there and don't stop believing in her.
Jun. 30, 2009 6:12 am
So glad you got some positive news. An kudos to you for naming that doctor to her colleagues! She needs to be dealt with. Stay strong, Gary!
Jun. 30, 2009 6:14 am
We are so happy to hear about Claire's progress! The love that you have for each other is enough reason for her to want to fight and continue to heal! As others have said, your love is an inspiration and you have been an incredible example to your daughters and others. we continue to pray for daily progress for Claire . Our thoughts are with you and your family. Hugs, Rach and Aaron
Jun. 30, 2009 7:13 am
Great News. I think almost everyone that has dealt with doctors/hospitals have had to deal with occasional BAD bedside manner. I know of a lady that just recently had enough of the neurosurgeon taking care of her husband and popped him a good one! You are doing a great job. Keep the faith.
Jun. 30, 2009 7:32 am
During my third pregnancy (after 2 losses), I had to go into the doctor for some bleeding. Turned out to be nothing, but the doctor I got stuck with that day said I should just end the pregnancy since he thought it was going nowhere because of my history. I was too stunned to react at the time. My usual doctor (who owned the practice) later said I would never have to see that doc again. Just a week ago, we celebrated my twins' 4th birthday! They were 2 months early and only weighed 2 1/2 pounds each when born, but were healthy. Goes to show, doctors who think they are always right (and liken themselves to God) are usually the ones who aren't.
Jun. 30, 2009 8:12 am
Hi gderr,---I hope that today is a good day for you & Claire! ~~You are so thoughtful to update all the AR family; I hope you know that we appreciate that...Reading your blog & all the comments, praying...has touched all our hearts. I hope that it has brought you encouragement & strength. ~~I pray & trust that you don't feel alone; that you stay strong in Claire's love for you. Praying that she remains strong & that her days only get better & better!! May you & your girls stay strong, healthy & hopeful....praying for God to bless you with good rest these nights. ~~~~stay firm believing God will restore her competely to you soon!!
Jun. 30, 2009 8:16 am
we all need to keep the faith in the hardest of times. BELIEVE.
Jun. 30, 2009 8:20 am
Gderr, I have been thinking and praying for you and your family. Please keep us updated on all Claire’s progress. Stay strong and God Bless.
Jun. 30, 2009 9:20 am
Jun. 30, 2009 9:24 am
What does that doctor know? Certainly not Claire and the force of prayer she has surrounding her. I don't know that I could have refrained from hitting her. 21 days. Just a small space of her life. She has shown you that she is still in there, use that to give you strength. Thank you for sharing with us and for keeping us updated. You and yours remain in my thoughts and prayers.
Jun. 30, 2009 10:56 am
It was so great to hear Claire responded:):):) I pray that she gets stronger and better every day. Remember Baby Steps, believe and stay strong. Continued prayers to you, Claire and your family.
Jun. 30, 2009 10:57 am
Gdrr, You are all in my prayers, just stay strong and Claire knows that you are all there for her she sounds like a fighter and it may take awhile but she will recover...
Jun. 30, 2009 1:13 pm
I am looking forward to hearing more positive results, as I am sure she will have them! Screw that doctor, what an idiot! I bet she got her license in a cereal box!
Jun. 30, 2009 1:28 pm
Finally, a response! YEA! It's a start, Keep positive and strong! Love ya! ♥
Jun. 30, 2009 2:01 pm
Gder..Thats so great she's responding!!!!
Jun. 30, 2009 4:20 pm
Great news about your wife! Keep up your positive thoughts as we all here have, too. Bless you and your family.
Jun. 30, 2009 6:43 pm
I can't tell you how happy I am to hear that she has responded!.. and I can't put in to words my "distaste" for doctors like that.. that show NO compassion whatsoever and most of the time they're wrong anyway. They're just in too much of a hurry to take the time and pay attention. Don't hear stuff like that Gary.. you know in your heart Çlaire is there and she's coming back. She WILL come back and she WILL respond more and start talking and in time she will be herself again. Keep the faith in God and in CLAIRE! She's fighting this so she can come back... don't lose faith! I'm still praying for you and yours.. *hugs*
Jun. 30, 2009 7:18 pm
What wonderful news....Miracles do happen every minute of every hour of every day....Peace and Prayers
Jun. 30, 2009 8:18 pm
I'm so happy that she is making progress! Your love is so strong, I have no doubt that is what is helping her pull through this. Hugs from 86!
Jul. 1, 2009 8:21 am
I cannot stand Dr's sometimes, they forget the patients and families are real people and not objects. I'm so sorry you had to deal with that. So happy to hear she is doing better it may be little by little but once again one day at a time. Baby steps right? :) You know know she is there and is fighting as hard as you are. Never give up and she won't either. Keep up the positive energy and attitudes it helps. My BIL was in a horrible accident, the dr's told my sis he wouldn't make it and if he did he would be like a child again and forever. Now 4 years later he is a fully functional Man, he wrks full time as a mechanic, goes to college, and has 3 children. Keep the faith and hope. We will keep praying.
Jul. 1, 2009 9:51 am
great news gderr, thanks so much for the update..keep the faith. thoughts and prayers continue to come your way. take care.
Jul. 1, 2009 12:25 pm
It's truly amazing what the human spirit (and body) can do! I still believe (even more now) that your Claire is going to be fine. Thank you so much for the update. Sue
Jul. 1, 2009 3:43 pm
So happy to hear that you got a response-baby steps & one day at a time. Keep yourself as healthy & strong as you can, Claire is going to need you to lean on & I know that you will be there for her all through this. Prayers are still coming your way-you sure do have a fighter there! Best wishes & thanks again for the encouraging update.
Jul. 1, 2009 11:20 pm
Have been away from my computer for a couple of days and could not wait to check in and see if there was an update. So very happy for all of you. This is so encouraging. Continued prayers from SC. God bless!
Jul. 2, 2009 4:52 am
What wonderful news, to have Clair responding to touch! Reading your latest post through my tears I am reminded of my favorite bible verse Isaiah 40:31. "They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength. They shall mount up with wings as eagles. They shall run and not be weary. They shall walk and not faint." May God continue to bless Claire, you and your family. You are in my prayers always. Love, Cyndi
Jul. 2, 2009 10:49 am
So glad to hear the inprovement, God is so good. I am still praying for her complete recovery and for all of you. You all need strength to continue helping Claire. Draw your strength form God. Keep us posted.
Jul. 2, 2009 11:42 am
gdeer, MIRACLES HAPPEN! Praying for all of you
Jul. 4, 2009 7:26 am
Well I have been away from the computer for a week and this is such good news to come back to. Praise the Lord for Claires responce! As for the unthinking doctor... that is to bad that she didn't think before she inserted foot! One never knows how another will progress and recover. Prayers and Love to you and Claire ♥
Jul. 4, 2009 7:02 pm
I know you dont have time to search and read, but there are stories that will tell you it can be done. I had a friend that just came home with family, she is still on her tube, but from what you are saying about Claire, she seems in better shape than my friend. You keep talking to her and making her laugh.. she can hear you!! xoxo...
Jul. 4, 2009 7:02 pm
I know you dont have time to search and read, but there are stories that will tell you it can be done. I had a friend that just came home with family, she is still on her tube, but from what you are saying about Claire, she seems in better shape than my friend. You keep talking to her and making her laugh.. she can hear you!! xoxo...
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gderr the dysfunctional

Living In
Columbus, Georgia, USA

Member Since
Mar. 2008

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Cooking Interests
Grilling & BBQ, Slow Cooking, Italian, Southern, Mediterranean, Healthy, Vegetarian, Gourmet

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About Me
i enjoy cooking. the wife considers it a chore. i hate yard work. she loves it. we mesh. i love bass fishing, reading, music, baseball, college football and my family.
My favorite things to cook
i love vegetables, soups, and italian cusine.
My favorite family cooking traditions
holidays are a big deal! christmas is my time to shine. i try to add a new recipe each year, but the family demands pretty much the same menu. kinda frustrating!
My cooking triumphs
i cared for my mother in law about 3 months when she had shattered her shoulder. i didn't work, so money was tight. we survived on only wife's paycheck during that time. ma-n-law had diet restrictions. it was difficult to make cheap, nutritious meals everyone would eat. we prospered as a family and learned alot about each other's strenghths and weaknesses.
My cooking tragedies
a stove top fire. i explained that one already. the grill falling over was another one...oops grill season is here! i love the tragedies...those are the ones that i'll always remember!
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