Beefcake To Wedding Cake, Or Where's The Beef??? Pt 4 - Home on the Range Blog at - 130707

Home on the Range

Beefcake to Wedding Cake, or Where's the Beef??? pt 4 
Oct. 17, 2009 2:02 pm 
Updated: Oct. 20, 2009 11:27 am
After Randyman's metamorphosis and our trip to the family Christmas party in palm springs, he became a regular visitor. There were times he was lauded as a hero, such as the incident when he rescued my Down pillow, "Fluffy", whom I found suspended from the ceiling fan where the boys had fitted him with a hangman's noose. (The grisly scene made me worry that his former persona had influenced them, but it turns out boys are just strange). Then there were times we drove him from the house for serious infractions, like waltzing in and placing 2 pieces in a jigsaw puzzle we had been trying to finish unsuccessfully for a week. (It turns out that dyslexia, which Randyman has in spades, has its benefits, too)

There were times the boys stood mesmerized as he lowered a 20 pound sledgehammer to his forehead, straight-armed, holding the end of the handle with only one hand...a feat of no small strength, and no great judgment, always an attractive combination to males of any age.

He taught them to repair both gas and diesel engines, to arc and MIG weld, the proper way to build fences, square a foundation, and played practical jokes on them with regularity, skyrocketing his popularity with their peers, giving them ammunition to torment both friends and family. He would somehow  make himself small and stand quietly in unexpected places until it got the desired result of startling a victim who would fall backwards screaming like a girl, while he and the other boys would collapse in paroxysms of laughter.

He ate at the house often, watched "Home Improvement" with the kids, and left us all exhausted from laughing at him laughing. ( He has infectious laughter, much like a baby.) A dyslexic with really lousy spelling and reading skills, he always let them push him into playing games like Balderdash or Scrabble, which he had no hope of winning, but they always chose him in Pictionary as people with "Y chromosomes" share a brain cell and can accurately guess 45 clues with the same stickman drawing. ( I do believe he taught them to cheat but I can't prove it). It highlighted one of the character traits that I admire most about him, which is his humility.

We had discovered Bamm-Bamm, with a big soft heart, who loved to laugh, loved kids and animals, loved the Lord, and clearly, loved US, so in spite of our earlier reservations, we agreed to marry him. Yes, all of us...except Cody, my youngest. He just wanted him for a pet.

...sorry..ONE more time! to be cont...
Oct. 17, 2009 2:53 pm
I feel compelled here to apologize for not incorporating food and epicurean information that extend beyond the titles of my blogs. After that nasty, heathen, self aggrandizing snob attacked Apple, who has a really great blog that I find delicious in many ways, I have lived in fear of him spewing on me and sending me to a corner to curl up in a fetal position. If y’all really want me to, I can make more of an effort to concentrate on those subjects…but it seems kinda silly because I get all my recipes from you guys ?
Oct. 17, 2009 5:16 pm
Oh, I love your food and your stories and will take whatever you've got and the poor guy who disfunctionally spewed hate on apple's blog be hanged! Allrecipes should be paying you and apple to blog! If you ever want to go solo let me know. My husband makes websites. Seriously, you're awesome!
Oct. 17, 2009 6:01 pm
oh wow, thank you beth, that is such a nice thing to say! It makes me feel really good. :)
Oct. 17, 2009 6:12 pm
No...I love your blog just the way it couldn't be more perfect! This one didn't make me made me cry happy tears (except for the pet thing...pretty funny!). My husband and his daughters proposed to me too. Petey, I have to say I think we are kindred spirits!
Oct. 17, 2009 6:13 pm
Wow Beth...thank you for your sweet comment too! I just read it :)
Oct. 17, 2009 7:10 pm
I just ran across your blog and after seeing your profile I see you are from Tehachapi! I lived there for over five years. We then moved back to Illinois, where I am now. Its so great to meet someone from Tehachapi
Oct. 17, 2009 7:35 pm
Really? We used to own the ranch up by Mountain Park, then we moved down below 202 and I had my training barn down there!
Oct. 17, 2009 9:32 pm
Petey, I do not know how I will be able to last till your next blog. It is tooo good! Thank You! I hope the old knee is feeling better. Have a wonderful Sunday, and take it easy, you deserve it! You Rock!
Oct. 17, 2009 9:39 pm
Please don't stop! I love and look forward to your blogs. Please don't make me go to rehab. I couldn't deal with the withdraw. Mag
Oct. 18, 2009 12:18 am
Don't change a thing...your blog is entertaining and informative, you are providing food for our souls! Thanks for opening your life to us.
Oct. 18, 2009 2:54 am
Love reading your blog, recipes or not! Actually there is a recipe in this story..only it is a reicpe for life.. The ingredients? Acceptance, tolerance, patience, and unconditional love, sprinkled with a lot of joy and laughter.. Sounds like a good recipe to me!
Oct. 18, 2009 7:38 am
I just started reading your blogs today. I can't get enough. You really should write a book.
Oct. 18, 2009 8:09 am
OMG, I hardly ever read the blogs, but today decided to, and lo and behold, I've read all 4 parts and can't WAIT to see the end!! And I will keep on reading them!!! Great story! Keep them coming!!
Oct. 18, 2009 9:16 am
No you have to keep blogging, recipe or no recipe. It's so entertaining to read how someone else married their stalker and lived happily everafter.
Oct. 18, 2009 9:33 am
Love the blog just as it is! But really, this to be continued thing is unacceptable... I want it all now! :)
Oct. 18, 2009 11:08 am
Thank you for a wonderfun story! :-)
Oct. 19, 2009 4:37 am
We have pictionary cheaters (male) in my family too! Laughed 'til tears were falling...
Oct. 19, 2009 6:52 am
Ahh, what a great guy! The boys found a true mentor and you got a funny friend to help keep you laughing on those long OR winters.
Oct. 19, 2009 11:34 am
♥ + ♥
Oct. 19, 2009 11:44 am
I just read all the parts to your story and I am in LOVE. I want more, more, and more:) Even had a little tear at the end of this one with Bamm-Bamm!
Oct. 19, 2009 1:00 pm
Petey, I can see how you could turn any Axe-murderer into HandyHunkyRandyman and finally into your present day, obviously much loved Bamm Bamm. You sound like a very loving, caring, talented gem! Thanks for the delightful break to this dreary Monday morning. Looking forward to more!
Oct. 20, 2009 11:27 am
joined first time membership just now,first time even reading blogs,was looking at recipes. wow what a story!i was supposed to be cooking supper 2 hours ago!i didnt know i could look at recipes and also enjoy exellent reading at the same site!thank you for your insight, i too am living with someone who people think is, well, different.sometimes we fail to see what is right in front of our own looking forward to your recipe posts and thank you for your wonderful, beautiful, and humorous story. anyone who reads it would benefit!hope i did this right, im such a noobie!
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Tehachapi, California, USA
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Princeton, Oregon, USA

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About Me
Kids are raised, we are ranchhands on a 250,000 acre working cattle ranch 110 miles from the nearest small town, so we raise a lot of our own food, vegetables, fruits, milk,eggs and meat. Love riding and working cattle, but find myself spending a lot more time in the kitchen, and the garden.
My favorite things to cook
Having 2 Jersey cows as well as milk goats, playing with fresh milk is a hobby, making our own butter, yogurt, sour cream, cheeses, soap and all the other great stuff you can do with fresh raw milk.
My favorite family cooking traditions
Homemade from scratch...anything! All traditions are sort of gone by the wayside, as we live so far from family now
My cooking triumphs
Most things from this site, this has been the best thing the internet has had to offer!
My cooking tragedies
A layered Jello dessert...the middle layer never set, so it did the 'ooze-wiggle'...and...well..I liquified a couple of chickens on 2 different occasions, turning them into a black gel. Moral of that story is, don't start cooking then go clean barns!...and there was the time that my kids were helping me make Thanksgiving dinner and SOMEbody (who resembled my youngest son) forgot to put the sugar in the pie!!!
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