Where's the Beef ??? pt 1
Oct. 14, 2009 9:18 am
Updated: Oct. 19, 2009 6:25 pm
People often ask how the HandyRandyman and I met, and I tell them the truth...he was a stalker.
Back in the day, when I was still training horses professionally, and going thru an ugly divorce (after 18 yr of marriage and 2 kids) I ordered a couple tons of hay from the local feed store and that afternoon, a truck pulled in the driveway with a monster of a man at the wheel.
He was about 6'2, with reddish hair, a scraggy, un-even, sorry looking beard that would make a china-man cry, massive shoulders, legs like a Quarter horse, and tattered, acid burned clothes. He began unloading hay bales and stacking them one handed. It was intimidating to say the least, so I bolted to the house and locked the kitchen door behind me. I promptly called the feed store to make sure they understood they were NOT to send this guy to my place EVER again!
When questioned about his strange behavior years later, he commented...
"I was trying to impress you"...he did...I was so impressed I considered buying a gun.
I would occasionally run into him at the feed store, or local gas station. He would never speak, just smile at me and stare and it gave me the willies. He was a huge man, and my boys and I came to the eventual conclusion that he was quite simply, an axe-murderer.
A short time later, my tractor broke down at a friends house, and I was making arrangements to have it picked up and repaired. Shortly after hanging up, the phone rang and my friends son said, "The guy is here, fixing your tractor".
To which I replied
"He can't be...I just called him and he's coming tomorrow..." to which he replied
"Well, there is a guy out there, and he's underneath your tractor."
Someone had sent the Axe-murderer to fix my tractor! Upon arriving, I groaned and wondered what I should do. It was freezing, the ground was cold and hard, and it was late at night. I reasoned it was better not to show fear, but ask him what he had figured out...
"Do you know whats wrong with it?"
...I wait patiently, in the total silence, until I can't stand it anymore. Tools clank, my teeth chatter, I can see my breath drifting away like smoke as I count the minutes waiting for an answer.
"WHAT do you think is wrong with it?"
I realized then and there, that there was much more wrong with this man than we had picked up on in our original assessment.
I can tell you this...16 years later, he still doesn't parse words.
To be cont...