Pulling The Plug, Or Got Milk?? Pt 3 - Home on the Range Blog at Allrecipes.com - 126926

Home on the Range

Pulling the Plug, or Got Milk?? pt 3 
Sep. 28, 2009 6:49 pm 
Updated: Oct. 5, 2009 10:16 pm
About 3 years ago, we took a job as ranch hands on a very large working ranch 110 miles from the nearest small town.
In this idyllic spot, the simple life has enveloped us, and consequently, we are once again enjoying "fresh squeezed" milk. I had a cow on Mothers Day...a Jersey, in fact, a gift from the wise and wonderful Randyman.

I requisitioned a rattan stool (Pier1) from the house as I had no milking stool per se, and happily pumped away morning after morning. Dolly, (aforementioned Jersey cow) would munch contentedly, frequently smacking me in the face with her tail, occasionally relieving herself with an unappetizing "plop", and perpetually swinging her hips to and fro (from TipMeOverNear to AlmostOutOf Reach)  and of course, consistently trying to dip her foot in my bucket.

She quickly gained skill at the placement of her hind feet and managed to sink it right to the bottom of a gallon of milk. Tossing the tainted milk aside, blood pressure peaking, I grabbed some hobbles and tied her hind feet together, preventing any more of her attempts to stick them in my business.

With her thus trussed, I proceeded to refill the bucket, not noticing she was getting mad. She was apparently not fond of hobbles and began to kick wildly in an attempt to free her feet. Its a scientific fact that when two entities are tied tightly together, and one moves, the other goes with it.

Before I could say "who needs milk?" she came crashing down on top of me, crushing my stool and pinning my lower half under her belly...with my arms free, I managed to release the bar holding her head, as I was afraid she might break her neck...and managed to unleash several hundred pounds of big, mad, rubbery cow which sorta melted all over me. Realizing help would not arrive until evening, I managed to wriggle my way free and assume a nearly vertical position.
After getting Dolly back to her feet, I gathered up my flattened milk pail, what remained of my stool, and my hobbles, left Dolly and my pride in the corral, and fixed myself a cup of very black coffee and a bowl of dry cereal.

to be continued...
She sings, she dances, she makes milk!
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Future cow wrangler
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note the offending hobbles...
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Milkmaids in training
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She's got Betty Davis eyes.....
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Little Emma...we wear the same size clothes...I probably shouldn't brag about that
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Sep. 29, 2009 7:36 am
Your profile picture never fails to give me a smile... the cutest cow ever!!! Who cares if you wear the same size clothes. Your stroy was a little scary today... beeee careful!!!
Sep. 29, 2009 10:11 am
As always, I loved your blog! Keep 'em coming and be careful with those cows!
Sep. 29, 2009 10:59 am
What a gorgeous milker!! We've been bottle feeding a blind calf for most of the summer. Milly the Moo Cow. I have a couple of milk maids in training myself.
Sep. 29, 2009 11:31 am
LOL@ Milly the Moo Cow!!
Sep. 29, 2009 12:37 pm
So,......I'm confused. (doesn't take much, does it?) Is Little Emma, Dolly's offspring? And if so, who's her Daddy?
Sep. 30, 2009 7:05 pm
Love your blogs! Mag
Oct. 5, 2009 10:16 pm
avon, Emma is Dollys little heifer, yes..Dolly had already been re-bred by artificial insemination when i got her, so yes, she is a single parent, not only that, but a foster mother as well
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Tehachapi, California, USA
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Princeton, Oregon, USA

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About Me
Kids are raised, we are ranchhands on a 250,000 acre working cattle ranch 110 miles from the nearest small town, so we raise a lot of our own food, vegetables, fruits, milk,eggs and meat. Love riding and working cattle, but find myself spending a lot more time in the kitchen, and the garden. forpeteysake.blogspot.com http://throughthedarkestvalleys.blogspot.com/
My favorite things to cook
Having 2 Jersey cows as well as milk goats, playing with fresh milk is a hobby, making our own butter, yogurt, sour cream, cheeses, soap and all the other great stuff you can do with fresh raw milk.
My favorite family cooking traditions
Homemade from scratch...anything! All traditions are sort of gone by the wayside, as we live so far from family now
My cooking triumphs
Most things from this site, this has been the best thing the internet has had to offer!
My cooking tragedies
A layered Jello dessert...the middle layer never set, so it did the 'ooze-wiggle'...and...well..I liquified a couple of chickens on 2 different occasions, turning them into a black gel. Moral of that story is, don't start cooking then go clean barns!...and there was the time that my kids were helping me make Thanksgiving dinner and SOMEbody (who resembled my youngest son) forgot to put the sugar in the pie!!!
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