What Gets My Goat, Or Got Milk?? Pt Deux - Home on the Range Blog at Allrecipes.com - 126543

Home on the Range

What gets my Goat, or Got Milk?? pt deux 
 
Sep. 26, 2009 6:23 pm 
Updated: Oct. 8, 2009 8:27 pm
Years and years after my relationship with my Holstein cow (whom we fondly referred to as "Jugs") we moved to a smaller piece of property, only 2 1/2 acres, and closer to town. The kids grew up, and moved out, my life had modernized as we lived in a real live, less than 100 yr old, contractor built home, unlike the humble abode at the ranch that was built 80 years before at a Chinese labor camp then moved there...but thats a story for another day...

I had been training show horses for years, spending lots of time on the road, but now HandyRandyman and I were about to enter a new season of life, away from the ratrace. It was time to start living the "Simple Life" again.

I began like anyone else would. I bought 3 chickens (Oprah, Ethel, and Schatzey, because everyone knows chickens with names perform better).
One afternoon, while perusing the Motorcycle section of the CameraAds, (a sign of terminal boredom) my eye was drawn to a great big ad for a newly freshened DAIRY GOAT.
Now, as you well know, a newly freshened goat, at a very reasonable price, in giant letters, in the MOTORCYCLE section of a paper, is clearly a sign from above. So, I did the sensible thing, and hooked up the latest monster trailer and headed for Bakersfield again, this time to pick up our new goat.

As I mentioned...she was very reasonably priced. I was thrilled. The only hitch was, it was necessary to strip her of milk twice daily as she had no kid with her (that's a term for 'baby goat' for those who don't know...Caprine owners seldom throw their children in to sweeten a deal, no matter HOW badly they want to get rid of the goat)

After lugging her home, it occurred to me there might be a reason she was so attractively priced. I discovered it, when I learned she had a quirky little habit of LYING DOWN whenever you tried to milk her. I threatened, I cajoled, but she continued to fold up like a cheap, portable chair, and it was getting dark. My back was aching, and we didn't have a stanchion yet, so, in desperation, I heaved her front end up on a picnic table, and had Randyman hold her back end up in the air so I could get underneath and get my 2 quarts of milk...all the while with him mumbling "dear Lord, I hope the neighbors cant see me...this looks so bad..."

Next morning: I drag myself up at 4:30 cuz Randyman is gonna leave for work and I want to enlist his help again. Due to the visibility from the breaking light, he stubbornly refuses and I am left to my own devices. But I am armed with confidence that I will prevail, as I have vast experience in animal training, and am known to be very resourceful, if not stubbornly single minded.

SUCCESS!!! It wasn't really that hard after all! All that was necessary, was to rob a few cinches and straps out of my tack room, and fashion a sling....wrestle it around a large, reluctant and recalcitrant goat, then hoist her up in an oak tree far enough so her feet couldn't reach the ground and VIOLA!! MILK!

I just love a bargain, don't you?
What a goat looks like a few hours before she kids...no joke
X
Photo Detail
what a baby Nubian looks like at 5 minutes old
X
Photo Detail
twins @ 1 hr old
X
Photo Detail
and at 2 weeks!
X
Photo Detail
 
My favorite Old Goat with one of the newer "kids"
X
Photo Detail
 
Comments
Sep. 26, 2009 8:26 pm
Lol! Goats...gotta love them! Kids (the goats) are so much fun, aren't they? They're the craziest little clowns around! Btw, what type of show horses did you train? English equestrian? Western? Just curious. :) I'm really into English riding.
 
Sep. 26, 2009 9:02 pm
Petey, I'm laughing so hard I can barely type. You gotta love goats. They are so funny. I has occasion to get to know an African pygmy goat better than you might expect, living in NY and all. I was quite stunned to learn they regard roses as a delicacy (she munched her way through my 114 bushes in a mere afternoon!) The only reason I wasn't looking up goat curry recipes? She was so darn cute! Love your posts. And yeah, what kind of show horses? I showed English for years.
 
petey 
Sep. 26, 2009 9:35 pm
I did Paint and Appaloosa breedshows, mostly futurities, in Hunter over Fences, Western Pleasure and Trail. I loved jumping until I broke my back in 89, and then I mostly just did E & W rail horses.. hahaha! OMG! 114 in one day? LOL
 
Sep. 26, 2009 10:15 pm
I rode Jumpers, mostly fault and out when I was younger, then I switched to Hunters when I realized I was running out of good luck. I haven't been on anything but a hack horse in years.
 
Sep. 26, 2009 10:38 pm
Hear, hear for the goats!!! They are just about the best pets/stock you could have! Our Cashmeres are just about the shed their lovely soft wool. Any spinners out there?
 
Sep. 26, 2009 10:44 pm
LOL Petey, now I'm trying to settle down for the night and thought I would just catch up on what's new in the blog world today. Great, now I'm going to giggle myself to sleep and have dreams of Oprah, Ethel, and Schatzey & all the "kids". You really do paint a very vivid picture with your storytelling. I love it.
 
Sep. 26, 2009 11:17 pm
Oh, cool! I've ridden some Appaloosas...they were probably the sweetest and most stubborn horses I'd ever met. Once they got it into their heads they weren't going to do something...they just wouldn't. Not without something to say about it anyhow, lol! I'm more of a jump rider but am trying to get back into dressage. Have fun with the goats! :)
 
momof5 
Sep. 26, 2009 11:21 pm
OMG I love your posts.Very cute.You are a very good writer.I am sure you have lots of great stories to tell.I am looking for a freshened milk goat.I too try to be as self sufficient as possible.And I have 5 children that drink milk like it is free and a endless supply.I am looking forward to fresh milk and learning how to make fresh cheese.Thanks for the laugh.
 
Sep. 27, 2009 12:58 am
Loved your goat story, and the accompanying pictures. I am a great fan of goats myself, but only get to visit them now and then. Nubians are so pretty! During my first encounter with goats, one tried to snatch the straw hat off my head and another tried to butt me in the behind, and after that, I was smitten. Goats-- gotta love 'em!
 
sueb 
Sep. 27, 2009 3:49 am
Sweet kids! Sweet story!
 
Sep. 27, 2009 5:53 am
Love goats!! I raised and milked Nubian goats at one time and still miss having them around. They are beautiful animals and make wonderful pets. Mine would follow me around outside like puppies! And the kids---oh, my! so cute and so much fun. Thanks for the story, you are bringing back such fond memories!!
 
Sep. 27, 2009 6:31 am
It was nice to visit your goat haven. They are beautiful and fun. Thanks for the blog. Mag
 
Sep. 27, 2009 9:28 pm
Wonderful, funny story, & written wonderfully! Thank you!
 
Sep. 28, 2009 7:22 am
love the pics Petey, I'm surprised she didn't try crawling in that d@rn tree all by herself.
 
Sep. 28, 2009 9:36 am
Petey, you're making me jealous! I only visit the goats my milk comes from - I can't wait until the day I can have my own!
 
Sep. 29, 2009 5:26 am
Petey The twins are beautiful , I was raised on a dairy goat farm , and just realized how fun they were (20 yrs later).Thanks for the post I love to read your posts as its always a smile to my face
 
Beth 
Oct. 8, 2009 8:27 pm
That is freakin awesome! This is like my experiments and interesting results in simple living multiplied by 10! Love it!
 
 
 
Click to Change your Profile Picture
petey

Home Town
Tehachapi, California, USA
Living In
Princeton, Oregon, USA

Member Since
Jan. 2007

Cooking Level
Expert

Cooking Interests
Baking, Grilling & BBQ, Slow Cooking, Asian, Mexican, Italian, Southern, Dessert, Kids, Quick & Easy, Gourmet

Hobbies
Knitting, Gardening, Hunting, Photography, Reading Books

Links
 
 
ADVERTISEMENT
Go Pro!

In Season

Best Thanksgiving Recipes
Best Thanksgiving Recipes

From the bird to the sides to the cranberry sauce and the pie, it's all here for you.

Top Turkey
Top Turkey

Choose from dozens of top-rated roast turkey recipes, from stuffed to deep-fried.

Special Holiday Offer!
Special Holiday Offer!

Delicious recipes, party ideas, and cooking tips! Get a year of Allrecipes magazine for $5!

About Me
Kids are raised, we are ranchhands on a 250,000 acre working cattle ranch 110 miles from the nearest small town, so we raise a lot of our own food, vegetables, fruits, milk,eggs and meat. Love riding and working cattle, but find myself spending a lot more time in the kitchen, and the garden. forpeteysake.blogspot.com http://throughthedarkestvalleys.blogspot.com/
My favorite things to cook
Having 2 Jersey cows as well as milk goats, playing with fresh milk is a hobby, making our own butter, yogurt, sour cream, cheeses, soap and all the other great stuff you can do with fresh raw milk.
My favorite family cooking traditions
Homemade from scratch...anything! All traditions are sort of gone by the wayside, as we live so far from family now
My cooking triumphs
Most things from this site, this has been the best thing the internet has had to offer!
My cooking tragedies
A layered Jello dessert...the middle layer never set, so it did the 'ooze-wiggle'...and...well..I liquified a couple of chickens on 2 different occasions, turning them into a black gel. Moral of that story is, don't start cooking then go clean barns!...and there was the time that my kids were helping me make Thanksgiving dinner and SOMEbody (who resembled my youngest son) forgot to put the sugar in the pie!!!
 
Argentina  |  Australia & New Zealand  |  Brazil  |  Canada  |  China  |  France  |  Germany  |  India  |  Italy  |  Japan  |  Korea  |  Mexico

Netherlands  |  Poland  |  Quebec  |  Russia  |  SE Asia  |  United Kingdom & Ireland  |  United States