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Scotdog is looking for: (2 recommendations)
Off topic - Gift giving when the invitation says "no gifts".

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Last updated: Nov. 16, 2012 12:24 pm
Posted: Nov. 16, 2012 7:07 am
 
Commented by: Scotdog
Nov. 16, 2012 7:07 am
I'm going to one of my closest friends 50 B-Day party next Wednesday. Her husband said on the invitation that she requested no gifts. I already know 2 friends that are of course, taking a gift. This drives me nuts. Do you bring something even when it says not to?
Comments:
Scotdog
Nov. 16, 2012 7:08 am
In defense of one friend, she is just asking all of us for old pictures to give her a photo album. Wish I had thought of that first, lol!
 
Patty Cakes
Nov. 16, 2012 7:09 am
If you Do bring a gift, after being Asked not to, sounds disrespectful to me. Maybe a nice bottle of wine or flowers? JMO:)
 
Don
Don
Nov. 16, 2012 7:10 am
Hi, If drinks, I usually take a bottle of wine. or my lady takkes a small box/bag of sweets/chocolates. Not a gift, but designed to be taken as part of the festivities. hope helps. cheers.
 
Patty Cakes
Nov. 16, 2012 7:12 am
The birthday lady Must have given this some thought, why would her wishes be Ignored? This is what She wants!! Pressure is off her friends, just go, have a Great time!!
 
Linda (LMT)
Nov. 16, 2012 7:12 am
If I got an invitation and it said "no gifts" I would not bring one to the party but I would however have something delivered. Either flowers or a gift but I would have it sent directly so it would get there before the day of the party.
 
Nov. 16, 2012 7:14 am
'No gift' for a birthday party means to me that you shouldn't buy the person a 'birthday gift'. However, there is nothing wrong taking a bottle of wine, box of chocolates or baking some cookies for everyone to enjoy at the party. If some other people attending choose to ignore the host's request, doesn't mean you have to.
 
Linda (LMT)
Nov. 16, 2012 7:15 am
I should say my reason for doing it is because I would have gotten a gift for my friend regardless cause it's a mile-stone bday. Or perhaps invite her to lunch your treat.
 
TwoSweetPickles
Nov. 16, 2012 7:16 am
I think it's rude to take a gift when asked not to. I have, on occasion, asked if it would be ok to provide something one might need, but if someone asks for no gifts, I'm not going to ignore that request.
 
TwoSweetPickles
Nov. 16, 2012 7:17 am
btw, I'm turning 50 next week too. I'll take all the gifts your friend doesn't want! ;-)
 
Bibi
Nov. 16, 2012 7:27 am
Mail her a nice card, treat her to lunch at a special restaurant!
 
Marianne
Nov. 16, 2012 7:27 am
I'd take a good bottle of wine. But for a really good friend, I'd do something either before or after the party anyway.
 
Marianne
Nov. 16, 2012 7:28 am
Like a lunch or dinner.
 
tash
Nov. 16, 2012 7:42 am
no gifts means no gifts. too many people have too much stuff these days and a lot are trying to declutter their lives. It drives me nuts when people give me more stuff. Why not ask if you can bring some food item to the party?
 
sassyoldlady
Nov. 16, 2012 8:26 am
I am guilty of taking them even if it says not to. But will usually keep it to something along the lines of lottery tickets or a mixed selection of locally brewed beers(we have a store that lets you mix and choose).
 
Scotdog
Nov. 16, 2012 8:35 am
Thanks everyone! I was called up to work, I'll be back :)
 
Nov. 16, 2012 8:36 am
Is her mother alive? If so, send her the flowers with a note telling her how much her daughters friendship means to you. You will brighten the day of two people. I always sent flowers to my mother on my birthday.
 
sanzoe
Nov. 16, 2012 8:57 am
In that situation we bri g a card with some lottery scratch off tickets. It gives them the chance to win big but takes the pressure off both you and the friend. Who doesn't like a chance to dream big!
 
Nov. 16, 2012 10:40 am
She is probably like me. When I want something I go and buy it. I am giving my husband a 70th birthday in January.We have asked for no gifts. I think it would be nice in those cases to bring a nice birthday card. I am going to have a basket for cards.
 
janet7th
Nov. 16, 2012 10:48 am
Marie, that is one of the sweetest and most thoughtful things I have ever heard.
 
Scotdog
Nov. 16, 2012 12:14 pm
Marie, her mom actually just passed this year. This will be a hard birthday for her whole family. Good idea though, I can make a donation in her mother's memory. She'd like that.
 
Scotdog
Nov. 16, 2012 12:15 pm
Good idea Sanzoe!
 
Scotdog
Nov. 16, 2012 12:24 pm
LOL TwoSweetPickles! I'll be 50 in March. She's the oldest (by a few months) of 6 girls that have been best friends since we started 9th grade. We still get together for GNO several times a year.
 
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Recommended by: bigcountry
Nov. 16, 2012 9:44 am
When we get an invite that says No Gifts - I frequently make a donation to the local food pantry in the person's honor. Or, for one friend we did a donation to the local animal shelter. For kids parties that say no gifts (particularly this time of year) we donate to our county Kids helping Kids program where they collect toys. I get to buy a gift, we all celebrate, and someone who needs the items benefit.
Comments:
CookieWeasel
Nov. 16, 2012 11:58 am
This is exactly what I was going to suggest. If someone donated money to an animal shelter in my name, I would be over the moon with joy!
 
Scotdog
Nov. 16, 2012 12:14 pm
She'd love that! Thanks so much!
 
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